758
00:50:35,803 --> 00:50:37,838
Well, come on,
let's just keep going.
759
00:50:37,839 --> 00:50:39,863
It'll run out of fluid eventually.
760
00:50:42,863 --> 00:50:47,778
This is what happens when
Hammond puts himself in charge.
761
00:50:47,779 --> 00:50:50,774
It was amazing, it
was like it was possessed.
762
00:50:50,775 --> 00:50:52,815
Jeremy Clarkson
and his haunted Porsche.
763
00:50:53,851 --> 00:50:57,846
No, the dashboard is a Christmas
tree and the car has stopped.
764
00:50:57,847 --> 00:51:00,858
Power steer...
Yeah, it's dead. Porche's dead.
765
00:51:00,859 --> 00:51:03,854
BLEEP
766
00:51:03,855 --> 00:51:05,826
Hammond!
767
00:51:05,827 --> 00:51:07,854
This road you chose
has killed my Porsche.
768
00:51:07,855 --> 00:51:10,814
I'm going to beat you to death
with a bat.
769
00:51:10,815 --> 00:51:12,818
Why? What?
If we'd have stayed in Chile...
770
00:51:12,819 --> 00:51:16,814
Stop questioning my leadership. That is not
what is required in an emergency situation.
771
00:51:16,815 --> 00:51:18,798
I'm driving along...
772
00:51:18,799 --> 00:51:20,846
I will deal with the responsibility.
773
00:51:20,847 --> 00:51:23,794
'And I dealt with it straight away.'
774
00:51:23,795 --> 00:51:24,830
Uh...
775
00:51:24,831 --> 00:51:25,863
'By leaving.'
776
00:51:27,771 --> 00:51:28,859
Right, then. Follow me.
777
00:51:31,867 --> 00:51:35,858
As leader, I had no choice, and believe
me, it's a responsibility that...
778
00:51:35,859 --> 00:51:39,826
It unsettles that I've
got to leave a man in the field.
779
00:51:39,827 --> 00:51:43,790
Now, that is a bit of a worry, to
be honest, because the Porsche 928
780
00:51:43,791 --> 00:51:46,822
was notorious for having very
complicated electrics
781
00:51:46,823 --> 00:51:48,866
and for having a lot
of electrical gremlins
782
00:51:48,867 --> 00:51:50,855
once it got beyond a certain age.
783
00:51:51,859 --> 00:51:56,810
Yeah, Jeremy's chances of
fixing that car? Um...
784
00:51:56,811 --> 00:51:59,778
He did once wire his own speakers,
785
00:51:59,779 --> 00:52:02,818
in the sense that he plugged them
in at the back of stereo,
786
00:52:02,819 --> 00:52:06,819
at home, you know, when you get
the little plugs, left and right.
787
00:52:09,775 --> 00:52:12,774
Mysteriously, without me
doing anything at all
788
00:52:12,775 --> 00:52:15,790
the Porsche had come back to life,
789
00:52:15,791 --> 00:52:17,782
sort of.
790
00:52:17,783 --> 00:52:21,798
OK, the wipers won't turn off,
the dials aren't working,
791
00:52:21,799 --> 00:52:24,810
the heater isn't working,
the lights aren't working -
792
00:52:24,811 --> 00:52:27,811
but the mighty V8
is back in business!
793
00:52:29,815 --> 00:52:31,859
However, a mile later...
794
00:52:42,783 --> 00:52:45,807
Now the engine's... Oh, Christ.
What's happened?
795
00:52:46,859 --> 00:52:49,810
What is that?
796
00:52:49,811 --> 00:52:52,847
I have the key! It's off!
797
00:52:54,787 --> 00:52:57,850
The engine and the starter motor
were both jammed on,
798
00:52:57,851 --> 00:53:01,807
and they could only be shut down
by disconnecting the battery.
799
00:53:03,831 --> 00:53:07,802
The situation is a lot worse
than I thought.
800
00:53:07,803 --> 00:53:10,838
This is what the top of the
shock absorber should look like.
801
00:53:10,839 --> 00:53:13,790
And if you look on this side you can
see it's been punched
802
00:53:13,791 --> 00:53:17,798
out of its mountings and has hit
the wiring loom,
803
00:53:17,799 --> 00:53:21,834
which is what has made the entire
electrical system go haywire.
804
00:53:21,835 --> 00:53:24,810
Now, I can fix the wiring loom,
probably fix the shock absorber,
805
00:53:24,811 --> 00:53:27,846
but what damage has been caused to
all the electrical components?
806
00:53:27,847 --> 00:53:29,779
I mean, do the lights work?
807
00:53:33,811 --> 00:53:37,843
It's half past two now.
Five hours of daylight.
808
00:53:40,847 --> 00:53:44,277
Meanwhile, further up the
road, May was getting
809
00:53:44,303 --> 00:53:47,804
some bad news about that
night's accommodation.
810
00:53:49,779 --> 00:53:51,822
Hang on, you're not saying
it's a bloody campsite.
811
00:53:51,823 --> 00:53:54,790
You've brought me on a crap road,
worse than the one we were on.
812
00:53:54,791 --> 00:53:56,790
We've got a car down,
you've ruined the Lotus
813
00:53:56,791 --> 00:53:59,786
and at the end of this you want me
to stay in a tent!
814
00:53:59,787 --> 00:54:01,826
You might find one of your
tent poles is missing,
815
00:54:01,827 --> 00:54:03,818
but don't worry, I know where it is.
816
00:54:03,819 --> 00:54:05,778
I'll have shoved it up your a...
817
00:54:05,779 --> 00:54:07,834
Signal's a bit dodgy this end
at the moment, James,
818
00:54:07,835 --> 00:54:10,783
but I guess you got
the message back there.
819
00:54:12,839 --> 00:54:16,814
This is what Hammond's road has done
to the inside of my wiring loom,
820
00:54:16,815 --> 00:54:18,834
look at this, just look at that.
821
00:54:18,835 --> 00:54:21,795
It just looks like the inside of
Steve Austin's arm.
822
00:54:23,839 --> 00:54:25,862
And they call me an orang-utan,
823
00:54:25,863 --> 00:54:28,859
they simply don't know what
they're talking about.
824
00:54:31,775 --> 00:54:33,794
At the end of a miserable drive
825
00:54:33,795 --> 00:54:36,775
I was now faced with
an evening's tenting.
826
00:54:37,787 --> 00:54:40,798
A whole day driving on a
terrible road, wrecking my car,
827
00:54:40,799 --> 00:54:44,602
possibly losing the Porsche,
breaking my spine,
828
00:54:44,703 --> 00:54:47,958
then Hammond says I have to put the
tent up while he goes off to get the food.
829
00:54:47,959 --> 00:54:50,822
And I don't know how his tent
goes together, and he knows
830
00:54:50,823 --> 00:54:55,782
absolutely the square root of jack
BLEEP about food and cooking.
831
00:54:55,783 --> 00:54:58,866
I wonder if anybody else... I
wonder if the viewers find Hammond's
832
00:54:58,867 --> 00:55:04,827
chirpy, upbeat, Ross-on-Wye
mannerisms as aggravating as I do?
833
00:55:06,811 --> 00:55:10,839
Right, everything is now taped up,
so let's see if it starts.
834
00:55:19,847 --> 00:55:20,867
There you go.
835
00:55:22,831 --> 00:55:26,847
At the campsite, I was returning
with our evening meal.
836
00:55:28,783 --> 00:55:29,831
I hope he's hungry.
837
00:55:33,787 --> 00:55:35,846
Hello! Hello!
838
00:55:35,847 --> 00:55:37,854
Dinner is here.
839
00:55:37,855 --> 00:55:39,826
Yeah!
840
00:55:39,827 --> 00:55:41,694
Meat. Yeah, very funny A lot of it.
841
00:55:41,695 --> 00:55:45,058
Yeah, but we've done that joke, cos Jeremy
did it in the top part of America. Yeah.
842
00:55:45,059 --> 00:55:47,834
About seven or eight years ago,
you've probably forgotten.
843
00:55:47,835 --> 00:55:50,770
This time it's different,
this time it's better.
844
00:55:50,771 --> 00:55:52,850
What you're going to have...
No, listen.
845
00:55:52,851 --> 00:55:55,866
...Is a traditional, authentic
gaucho barbecue.
846
00:55:55,867 --> 00:55:57,806
That's a whole cow.
847
00:55:57,807 --> 00:55:59,814
Hey, they eat a lot of meat
round here.
848
00:55:59,815 --> 00:56:04,790
Finish the tent. I'll have it on
in a moment. Seriously. Crack on.
849
00:56:04,791 --> 00:56:05,803
Right.
850
00:56:07,839 --> 00:56:10,855
It's a problem, essentially,
of getting the wrapper off.
851
00:56:14,835 --> 00:56:19,838
Several hours of peeling later,
Hammond's dinner was underway.
852
00:56:19,839 --> 00:56:24,774
And while we ate, we discussed
the fate of our colleague.
853
00:56:24,775 --> 00:56:29,826
If we hear the sound of two...
Well, or one cylinder,
854
00:56:29,827 --> 00:56:32,842
it's probably the 2CV. Yeah.
855
00:56:32,843 --> 00:56:36,806
But any more than two,
it must be the Porsche.
856
00:56:36,807 --> 00:56:39,810
What if he couldn't fix it
because he's stupid and ended up...?
857
00:56:39,811 --> 00:56:41,818
No, but he's an expert on electrics.
858
00:56:41,819 --> 00:56:43,799
Hang on that's an engine.
859
00:56:46,839 --> 00:56:49,786
What is it?
860
00:56:49,787 --> 00:56:51,834
It's the unhappiest man
in the world, is what it is.
861
00:56:51,835 --> 00:56:53,834
Oh, no!
862
00:56:53,835 --> 00:56:57,867
Oh, no! I really...
I honestly thought that would be...
863
00:57:00,775 --> 00:57:03,815
Oh, hang on. That...
It's stalking us. There it is!
864
00:57:04,863 --> 00:57:08,774
He's going to be
so pleased with himself.
865
00:57:08,775 --> 00:57:11,802
I have been doing manual labour.
866
00:57:11,803 --> 00:57:13,578
Good God. Really?
867
00:57:13,679 --> 00:57:16,690
I hardly like to admit it, but I was praying
that the Porsche would turn up.
868
00:57:16,691 --> 00:57:18,938
I didn't want to see it die.
That is absolutely fabulous.
869
00:57:18,939 --> 00:57:22,618
I've actually got dirty hands from
actual work. Dirty hands. What was it?
870
00:57:22,819 --> 00:57:25,806
I had to fix the loom, fix the ECU,
871
00:57:25,807 --> 00:57:29,782
and then find some metal,
bolt that to the inner wing
872
00:57:29,783 --> 00:57:32,854
and reattach the top of
the shock absorber to that.
873
00:57:32,855 --> 00:57:35,798
Oh, well done.
Have you got any food for me?
874
00:57:35,799 --> 00:57:37,814
Oh, has he?! Ah!
875
00:57:37,815 --> 00:57:40,854
I'm not entire... I can't
remember where it came from,
876
00:57:40,855 --> 00:57:42,790
I sort of lost track.
877
00:57:42,791 --> 00:57:45,866
There's a lot in a cow.
That's... Um, that's a piece of it.
878
00:57:45,867 --> 00:57:48,838
Have we got any vegetables?
879
00:57:48,839 --> 00:57:51,802
Is that a vegetable over here?
Yeah. Yeah, sausages.
880
00:57:51,803 --> 00:57:53,834
Welcome to our little camp,
that's the main thing.
881
00:57:53,835 --> 00:57:56,826
Right, where is the hotel
where we're staying?
882
00:57:56,827 --> 00:57:59,842
Well, I just said -
welcome to our little camp.
883
00:57:59,843 --> 00:
Tłumaczony, proszę czekać..
